If you are wondering where I have been, I have been recuperating from meeting my deadline last week. I jumped through hoops to get everything done that I had to, in order to get my work in ( this is for my new business venture). Every night since, I have fallen asleep while putting the kids to bed, so my night blogging has been rudely interrupted – for good reason though.
I also had a session at the osteopath which may have left me exhausted too, and along the way I have lost my taste of sense and smell. Very frustrating – has this happened to anyone of you out there?
I have also had two kids home sick, which means I have had 3 kids at home during the day, and so therefore my time has been extremely limited.
Whilst ignoring my family and denying myself physical normalicy, like eating and sleeping, my yetzer harah ( alter ego) decided it would be the perfect time to mess with my head. It kept on telling me that there was no need for this business. There was no good reason why my kids should be eating pizza for dinner with a babysitter, while their mother is working her butt off in the library because there are too many distractions at home. It told me that if I was not doing MY thing, I would have had the energy to read that bedtime story, or not lost my temper so quickly. There would have been a hearty soup for dinner with chicken casserole, and baked apple pie for dessert! It basically told me that I failed dismally in the mother department, and achieved flying colors in the selfish, self-centred arena.
Friends, sisters and mom, all gave me the same advice. It is temporarily like this. Not every week will be deadline week. Not every meal is going to be pizza and poutine ( if you don’t know what this is – it is better that way. It is HIGHLY addictive!)Just finish, do it. And thanks to them – I did.
So now I wait, and see if my stuff gets approved and if there will be any reason to continue further.
It is a new week, the house smells of my freshly baked muffins, and the children are all happy with their full little bellies, and their mommy by their sides.