Here we go!

This could be my most important blog yet.
I’m not a stand on a soap box kind of gal. I have my very definite beliefs and I’m not shy to be vocal about them, but not the type to shout through a loud speaker and be in your face.
But now it’s different. Now I feel compelled to stand on the rooftops and shout to the world, on the top of my lungs and be posted via satellite across the globe at the highest decibels possible.
Do you heard my primal scream? Do you feel my angst? My scream comes from a place so deep within me that its not even audible – it’s tangible. It’s a scream of frustration, clarity, anger, hope, sadness, anticipation, impatience, faith – even happiness; all wrapped up in a twisted silent scream.
As I sit here in my house in Eretz Israel, I have to pinch myself to realize that this is real. I actually feel like I’m living a crazy futuristic movie.
I cannot actually believe I am here, and when I think of how I actually got here, it is even more unbelievable that I’m here. Anyone who has known me in the last 15 years, knows how much I wanted to be here. But no one ever believed that I would be. They just thought it was delusional rantings of a crazed woman who was unsatisfied with her life. People just thought I was spoiled. After all I had a very good life in Montreal. Why could I just not be satisfied and happy?
Well Baruch Hashem, I never felt like MTL was home. I longed to be here, every single day.
And here I am. It’s been almost 6 months now. Six months of sheer unadulterated spiritual and physical excavation. To say that we have come here and had the best time of our lives, in the sense that one thinks when they come on vacation, is completely incorrect. We have been challenged with every single fibre of our being, emotionally, ideologically, inter- personally. We have have been tested on so many different levels.
And as I collapsed into bed after each exhaustive and draining day, I have melted into dreamland invigorated and excited. Eretz Yisroel is acquired through challenges. So everyday that goes by is one step closer to my acquiring entree to the land that was promised to us.
And finally after months of questioning ourselves and deciding the future of our kids, we settled on a yishuv, a place neither of us dreamed we would be.
And thank G-d. The people here have been amazing. They have welcomed us with more than open arms. They have opened their homes, their linen closets, their kitchens….. They have opened their hearts.
Previous new Olim have pat me on the back, and empathized with us. They had also been through the ringer, but everyone of them has told us to hang in there, it’s so worth it.
I have had incredibly well educated, extremely pious individuals from gush Katif bake me challah, and tell me how amazing I am for coming to Israel. Me?!? Through one women’s story of bravery, and steadfast emunah in Hashem – that even though her and the whole communitie’s homes were ripped from underneath them, and their entire community and livelihood was displaced, they understood it was a heavenly decree and they accepted it with love. And as she and I embraced, tears rolled down our faces. Tears of joy replacing those tears that I wept as I watched my brothers and sisters in pain as they were taken by force out of gush Katif. It is through her, and people like her that I have a place in Israel. It is through people like her that welcome me, that smile from within. They know and understand the beauty of living here, and they welcome each and every new oleh – each of us playing a role in the anals of history. Here we are the everlasting Jew. Defying all odds. Here we are standing testament to the promise G-d gave to Abraham some 5775years ago. And perhaps through the merit of my tears on their behalf, that i am here today.
And the hardship that I talk of, the hardship that everyone says about Israel – it’s not a hardship like one envisions. In fact I don’t want it to be called a hardship. It’s called building your emunah. Things don’t go in a predictable way here. We have to realize that the order that runs in the rest of the world – does not fly here. One has to shift gears. And this is where the magic begins to happen. Once someone begins to see that hand of Hashem here, it is without doubt that the Jewish soul and the land of Israel are so inexorably intertwined. That the potential to live a most fulfilling life as a Jew – is here. at the source. The beginning of history, world and Jewish. It all began here.

The day Earl decided to leave to go back to Canada, was the day the ugly face of terror raised its vicious head.
That week I have never felt more afraid, more unsure. I was petrified. I was frozen. I was full of doubt, did I do the right thing?
For years now,I have listened to lectures that state the final test, at the end of days, will be one of emunah. It will appear like the world is against, us, as we have not one ally. It will feel like all hope is lost. But have no fear, it is all a smokescreen. This was my test. I have chosen to stay, to stay with my brothers and sisters. I wish my immediate family was with me. Both physically and ideologically.
I have chosen to stay in Israel and be a part of the Jewish people. My forefathers longed to be on this holy land for so long. And now, that we can hop on a plane,and come with ease, we push it away. Secular Jews say Israel is difficult, there is a different mentality there, and it’s hard to make a living. Religious Jews say they are waiting for moshiach to come. Then they will come.
Shall I remind you all that only one fifth of Jews left Egypt. And for those of you who believe it was just an interesting fairy tale, they have now found ancient Egyptian remains under the Red Sea ( you know – the one that split). Google it.
Every Jew that comes hastens the arrival of moshiach. Once there is a majority of Jews living in Israel, prophecy will return. We are nearly there. Do you want to be a part of the action, or do you want to be on the sidelines? And maybe never actually making it here.
I don’t know if you are all watching the news lately, but the world has gone quite mad. Isis is not some fictional evil army. Iran is not some ancient mirage. It’s a very real threat – that can reduce the world to nothing.
Those ancient ramblings about Armageddon and the end of the world – aren’t seemingly so far fetched anymore. There are a few tyrannical evil mongers, threatening to take over the world. It’s almost comical how typical they are, if it were not so scary. Thousands of lives are being lost daily, as the danger encroaches.
And the West, in it’s little PC bubble, carries on hedonistically. Ignoring the warnings…..
America has a Moslem sympathizer as president, but is probably a believer himself. A mole.
Canada has just lost its Israel ally in Steven Harper. Instead Justin Trudeau has been voted in. A young good looking liberal idiot.
Europe – well do i need to say anything about their weak leadership. We’ve all seen the writing on that wall.
The South African government just welcomed the leader of Hamas with a heroes welcome. I wonder where their loyalties lie.
The French Jews are coming here in droves – why? Because antisemitism is rife.
People!?! Why wait? Why does it have to get so bad that there is no option but to leave?
As a religious Jew – none of this suprises me. I have been expecting it. The Torah speaks of this time. The predictions made over two thousand years ago are materializing before our eyes. If you dont believe me – just ask your local orthodox rabbi. Or just google it. Again.
When we are far from who we are supposed to be on a national level – our enemies are strong. Don’t you get it?
When do we unite? When do we stand up and declare that we are Jewish? It’s not when we want to join that country club, or live in a certain socio-economic neighbourhood. Or a thousand other reasons not to be overtly Jewish.
The only time we unite,is when some Jew got attacked, or worse – murdered. For the sake of being Jewish
I sit here and i see the rallies going on around the world. Solidarity for Israel! It’s fantastic! But really – what good are they doing? Buy Israeli products! Great! It does help the economy. If you lived here,you would only Buy Israeli products, really causing a boost, instead of a tiny ripple.
Instead of giving your brainpower and might to your non Jewish sovereign state – get that El Al flight now – Israel could use you. If we all pooled ourselves together – there would be supply and demand,there would be jobs for all. And as a bonus, moshiach would come peacefully.
There is the other option. We are watching it unfold. It’s not a movie- it’s real. The prophecies are not an ancient scroll just unearthed by an Indiana Jones type character.
Jews have studied these transcripts for years,but we don’t live in the future – we live in the present. Our only weapon against the evil and hate is to learn Torah, to start taking on mitzvahs! OMG KEEP SHABBAT!
I can’t keep quiet any longer. I will be held accountable.
I don’t want to hear that I am a religious zealot. I am not. I am a simple mom / housewife. But I, little me,have learnt some Torah. I know that what I am doing as a practicing jew – is what we have done for eons. It’s just got forgotten about 100 years ago.
We have to go back to the source. We are so far removed.
And for those still reading this- lets say I’m wrong, and you are right. Lets say there is no after l ife, no reward for keeping the Torah. Then at least you will have lived your life as a decent human being.
But what if I’m right and you’re wrong…..?

All I’m saying, rather pleading is dont forget who you are. As Jews we are the chosen people. Not because we are so wonderful. We were chosen and therefore have a responsibility. We have to be a light unto the other nations. We have to Exude a high moral standard, and thereby uplift the world around us. The only absolute good yardstick that we have is the Torah. Without this blueprint, there is no absolute value of what is good and what is not. So I urge you all. My non religious family and friends reading this. Find a series of classes on any topic that may interest you. Start at aish.com or Chabad.org
Please. Begin to learn, begin to open your eyes. There is a master plan here…. Learn what your part is. It says that when we die, the souls sees what it’s potential was supposed to be in this lifetime. When it realises how far from that reality it actually was- that idea is hell. The tremendous suffering at the idea of knowing that it had wasted an entire lifetime on nonsense. There is no going back.
And my religious friends, go deeper. Do more.
And for all of us, start making a plan. Get here now, as contrary as that may sound. This is our home. We all feel it when we come on our 10 day vacation. But then we leave. This is where we belong.
I look forward to greeting you all. Soon!
May we only hear good things, and share in simchas! Am Yisroel chai!

2 thoughts on “Here we go!”

  1. Bravo !you have expressed the deepest sentiments in my heart.Your ️message should be printed in every Jewish magazine ,religious and secular .You know where my heart is -I have asked a shaila for myself …have been told by rav Koenig from tzfat that I must wait until I am older ..huh??Bh my parents should have arichut Yamim …I will not forsake my awesome mitzvah-That not withstanding ,I know
    Mashiach is knocking on our doors ..it is obvious …Icry and pray for these most difficult times to pass quickly -wish you could have been at the gathering in
    My home I really expounded on enduring suffering and what one must do to strengthen themselves -I argued with the rav that whatever bit i accomplish here could be increased manifold in Israel-I am so happy that you are living your dream and mine,
    -my true soulmate friends are there in eretz yisrael and I pray to be reunited ..speedily!ליבי במזרח….)my heart is in the east !)planning a trip in mid february בעזרת השם ..looking forward to seeing you all!shabbat shalom!♥️Esther

    Sent from my iPhone


  2. I wish I had time to write more, but it’s Friday morning and there is BH so much to do. I just want you to know candy that although you may sound a little bit “too much” or a little bit “extreme ” the words you say are true.
    We must not press snooze on the alarms that are ringing and go back to our pc lives that have alluring comforts despite the sufferings we each have.
    We need to stop distracting ourselves from the purpose of our lives here (yes I’m on my iPhone right now instead of starting my Challa dough… We’re all guilty of it) do some small and concrete actions to bring ourselves toward the real self we have the capability of becoming. Hashem loves us and He gave us the greatest gift, a pure, holy portion of Himself. He gave us our life force. We have such great ability and we often let it go unused(hence it needing to be squeezed out of us through difficulty) tap into your great soul and recognize how special you are and like you said candy- learn more, KEEP SHABBAT, go deeper…
    We all have a treasure house of amazing strengths and talents within us.
    Thank you candy for sounding the alarm….you are correct. The Torah tells us to believe every day is a day we can be redeemed. We seem to have forgotten that we are in a situation from which we NEED to be redeemed from. We can help bring the geula with sweetness, we can help bring it sooner…and we can get ourselves to be part of the one/fifth that believes in redemption and anticipates it. We each are a light out here and those of us who are not yet able to come to EY have important roles here in America (or where ever you are outside Israel) we need to work on ourselves so we can shine so brightly that we help light the way for our families and our friends and so each person who meets us senses kedusha and we can just be a kiddush Hashem wherever we go. We can do it. And we must do it.
    Wake up ourselves and wake up our souls 🙂 have a beautiful shabbos. And if you don’t regular keep shabbos. Maybe there’s one thing you can do this very shabbos, and those who keep shabbos- how can we elevate shabbos just a little more.

    Thank you candy
    🙂 Chaya Kayla. We miss you here in mtl and I’m sooooo happy you’re finally home and on the way to aquiring it as your very own. May we all soon join you with shalom and simcha

    Good shabbos!
    Thank you candy.


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